“Don’t get into sales,” my mother once told me. But not for the reasons you might think. 

Sure, she knew women were often overlooked in what’s still a very male-dominated field. But that’s not why she wanted me to pursue other goals. Rather, she thought I’d be so good at sales that once I started down that path, I wouldn’t want to give anything else a try. She wanted me to have other experiences first.

I did, momentarily, have those experiences—majoring in English, philosophy, and art history, starting my career in marketing, then embarking on my sales career. But today, as Celigo’s vice president of North American sales, I think I’ve also proven my mother right. 

During my 30-year career in technology sales, I’ve managed to break through the glass ceiling. And according to Gartner, that’s still pretty rare: women only fill 31% of senior-level B2B sales roles. 

Yet I’ve also learned something critical. I’m not alone. So many women rock at sales.

In fact, I’ve met and worked with plenty of women throughout my career who are natural sales leaders. From the female sales manager who was a mentor to me early on in my career, to the women at Celigo today who aren’t afraid to be creative in their selling techniques. And of course, to my mom herself, who has had an epically successful career in sales, specializing in commercial real estate.

I think many of those women bring something unique to the sales environment. A special superpower: emotional intelligence. 

But emotional intelligence isn’t unique to women. Sales teams can nurture it throughout their entire team for a competitive edge.

Yes, sales are emotional

Traditionally, emotions may not seem like they have a place in the sales environment. But the most in-tune sales associates understand the role emotions play. If someone trusts you, they are more likely to buy from you. If they’re excited about your product—or afraid of the repercussions of not having it—they’re more likely to move forward with a deal. 

It makes sense, then, that being able to read those emotions—and empathize with them—will give you an advantage in a sales environment. But a high emotional quotient (or EQ) goes further than that, helping sales associates communicate more effectively and navigate conflict better—encouraging a more creative, collaborative team. 

From what I’ve seen in the field, someone with high emotional intelligence knows when and how to ask different questions of prospects, and is able to build a stronger, more personal rapport. It’s also a great attribute in a leader as well. A strong EQ helps sales leaders empathize with the views and concerns of their team, enabling better decision making that takes everyone’s input into consideration. 

But while women, in general, are raised to be more in tune with their emotions and those of others, emotional intelligence doesn’t have to be gender specific. Anyone can learn it.

Nurturing emotional intelligence in your team

At Celigo, I push all of my sales associates—no matter their gender—to think about how they can leverage emotional intelligence to shorten the sales cycle. To empathize, collaborate, and be creative. So how do you teach emotional intelligence? Here are four tips I’ve learned over the years: 

1. Welcome vulnerability 

It’s hard to develop emotional intelligence if you don’t feel comfortable being open with your own emotions and vulnerable about your mistakes. To create an open, honest environment, I encourage my salespeople to admit when something goes wrong, and use that failure as a learning opportunity. Encouraging them to expose vulnerabilities during the sales process, as well, can help them form a deeper bond with their sales prospects that goes beyond a canned “sales pitch.” 

2. Lead by example

By demonstrating emotional intelligence yourself—showing self-awareness of your own behaviors and empathy for those of others—you’ll encourage everyone to express themselves freely. To extend that mentorship into the sales dynamic at Celigo, I have salespeople listen in on calls with myself and other leaders, where I know emotional intelligence will specifically come up with clients. Then I analyze and discuss what happened, so that they can learn to effectively do the same. 

3. Role play with your team 

Role play is another way to teach your sales team the role emotions play, and to get them in tune and comfortable with displaying their own emotions. As a sales leader, it’s a great idea to set up time for one-on-one role play and group role play with your team, so that your salespeople can practice their emotional intelligence and learn how to apply it. For me, this offers an opportunity to coach team members in a less pressure-filled environment, and my team a chance to experiment with how to apply emotional intelligence best within their own unique sales approach. 

4. Reward high EQ

One of the reasons many women have traditionally had trouble making it to sales leadership roles is because the qualities they bring to the table are often overlooked. But by rewarding your salespeople—no matter their gender—for displaying strong emotional intelligence, you can show everyone that you’re prioritizing a full range of skills. This can either be when salespeople show EQ with clients or prospects, or with colleagues. And it doesn’t always have to be a monetary reward either—a public “pat on the back” will show everyone this is a quality you value.   

Showcase your team’s full potential

Emotional intelligence is a powerful tool in your sales team’s toolbox. Yet for years, it’s been overlooked in favor of what are seen as more traditionally “male” traits (often more transactional or tactical attributes). 

Don’t get me wrong, those traits continue to have their place as well. But by embracing emotional intelligence instead of overlooking it—and learning from the experiences of women in general—you can give your entire team a new sales superpower to bring to their deals. All while making your sales team more equitable as well.

And that, I’ve learned, can be the secret ingredient that supercharges your entire sales program.

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Want to learn more? Connect with Diana on LinkedIn and follow Celigo for more insights from our executive team.

Diana Dorobek is the Vice President of North American Sales at Celigo. With more than 20 years of experience in enterprise software sales, she has a proven track record of building and developing top performing sales teams. She is a proud champion of women and helped start NetSuite’s Women Who Mean Business events. Please join her Women in Business LinkedIn Networking group at Women in Business.